I hate nightmares. :( They leave you feeling horrible the next day and you just really don't get any rest. I wonder when I can finally get done and over with this. It leaves me very lethargic and feeling ominous the next day. Not happy. :(

The little things...

Sometimes when life gets too fast paced and there are too many things going on and everything just seems to be too big you tend to forget about the little things. That's what happened to me last week. Friday was a very emotional day filled with disappointments add to that the fact that I was being very hormonal. It was dramafest all over. But then before sleeping I prayed about it and woke up feeling a tad better.

Life is filled with disappointments, there are just some things beyond my control. When I woke up I reminded myself that what I did control was how I would react to things. Happiness is always a choice. And though I must admit that it took me most of the day just sitting around watching Shameless before I decided to get up and move to the bedroom to take a nap. Haha...to give you perspective, the bu just got in from duty and was napping too so I didn't want to disturb his nap by waking him up. See, sooooo thoughful. I managed to snap myself out of all the drama.

When everything seems to be going wrong the best way to deal with it is to remind yourself that no one is more in control of your happiness than yourself. After an extremely sad end to my work-week my weekend was awesome because it's the little things that make life worthwhile. Take for example spending the entire weekend with my now public servant bu. Finally getting to watch a movie that you've both been raring to catch. Being even more impressed with the movie despite the already high expectations. Spending time with your godchildren even if it was just for a little while. All awesome things packed into an awesome weekend.

Without the hardships, disappointments, heartbreaks I would have never been able to appreciate things the way I appreciate them now. Never loose sight of the little things because in the end, it's really the little things that make life awesome. Here's the looking forward to more weekend breaks with the bu. :D

It's just not my day...

When I was younger I would always pray to God for a sign. Whatever it was, be it my chinese test, "Lord give me a sign if I will pass this test", or a crush, "Lord please give me a sign that we were meant for each other". Everything in my life needed a sign...and then you realize that signs are everywhere. Once you start looking for signs they just seem to be all over the place. And it dawned on me, every sign that I wanted to see is me somehow interpreting things the way I want them to be interpreted. So I grew up and I learned not to ask for signs anymore. I learned to trust in God because whatever life throws at me I know there has got to be a reason for it.

Today was not a good day. 

It started out great but everything quickly turned horrible. I don't even know how to begin to explain how I'm feeling right now. Hurt. Exhausted. Disappointed. Rejected. Those are just some of the adjectives I can think of right now but I it doesn't really sum it up. Right now as I type this though I just feel empty, lost. I know these things have a way of working themselves out and I believe that things happen for a reason. But allow me this one day to feel horrible about it and maybe tomorrow when the day starts anew I can get a fresh perspective and see things a little bit lighter.

Today was a horrible day...but there's always tomorrow.

Focus.

You know that feeling when you have soooo many things to do and sooooo many commitments to juggle and in the process you keep forgetting to do things that are important. Gaaaah, I want to bonk myself in the head sometimes.

That big change in my life is starting to stress me out. I think it's time to call in the troops! Me needs some help! :O It's crazy that it feels like the list of things to be done just keep getting longer and longer. I need to sit and list down all the things that need to be done, prepared and finalized. We can do this. FOCUS!

Change is coming! :D

I just got home from a really looooong day of errands. I have to go to a friend's party but it looks like I might not make it out, I have a massive headache and well, my cough is very persistent despite the fact that I've finished my meds.

Anyway, the reason I decided to blog today is because as I was browsing through a friends blog I got inspired by her optimism. :D You see, growing up I was sort of the pessimist. And then I realized that when you learn to look at things from a different, more sunny perspective, everything changes and life just becomes better. I know it is because my faith and relationship with God has grown. I have faith that even if things don't really seem great, in due time, they will turn around,  I just have to be patient.

I've been extremely excited to start this year. Yup, that's right...this year is going to be awesome. There's a lot of things to work out and a lot of work to be done. But I know that it will be great! :D I can't wait to be able to share it with everyone, but for now...trust me when I say,

photo sourced from the internet

It is bound to be awesome! :D